Group Analysis Am I My Brother’s Keeper? The Analytic .

4361412012GAQ45210.1177/0533316411436141Ashuach: Am I My Brother’s Keeper?: Sibling TraumaGroup AnalysisArticlegroupanalysisAm I My Brother’s Keeper? The AnalyticGroup as a Space for Re-enacting andTreating Sibling TraumaSmadar AshuachThe thesis of this article, is that the analytic group is a place for areliving and re-enactment of sibling relations. Psychoanalytic andgroup analytic writings about the issue of siblings will be surveyed.Juliet Mitchell’s theory of ‘sibling trauma’ and how it is reflected inthe group analytic group will be briefly presented. It will be arguedthat the group is a place in which ‘sibling trauma’ is re-enacted andcan effectively be treated. My thesis will be supported with clinicalexamples.Keywords: sibling, sibling trauma, horizontal transference,re-enactment.The Psychoanalytic View of Sibling RelationshipsThe psychoanalytic literature concerning the relationship among siblings is relatively sparse. Over the years there have been someattempts to explain clinical and real-life observations suggesting theimportance of relationships with siblings. However, there is no general agreement regarding the nature of these relationships. Are theybased on hatred, murderous wishes and/or death fears? Is the birth ofa sibling necessarily traumatic? Can there be strong positive relationships between siblings? And what about an only child? What cansibling relationships contribute to the development of social values?The nature and significance of sibling relationships and friendships The Author(s), 2012. Reprints and permissions: sagepub.co.uk/journalsPermissions.navVol 45(2): 155 –167; DOI: 10.1177/0533316411436141

156Group Analysis 45(2)among peers in emotional development has become of interest onlyin recent years.The relative absence of literature about the relationships and influence of siblings and peers stems mainly from their horizontal transference character. They are void of the vertical transference thattypifies parent–child relationships. Literature on family and grouppsychology has tried to give to sibling relationships transference relevance in its own right, but here, too, the main contention has beenthat problems are explained by defects in parenting. Furthermore, inthe psychoanalytic writings there are few reports of competitionbetween siblings. One exception to the dearth of writing about siblingissues can be found in descriptions of training institutes, at whichcandidates in treatment with the same analyst may be highly sensitiveabout their relationships with each other.Freud (1921) sees competition among siblings as inherent tohuman life and explains it as resulting from parental dynamics.Siblings are seen as hated competitors for mother’s breast, as replacements for absent or not-good-enough parents or as identification figures. It is the eldest child, pushed aside by the birth of a sibling, whois most threatened. Nonetheless, Freud believes that struggle withsibling threat through the defences of reaction formation, repetitionand identification is important and can lead to development of socialjustice and equality, social sensitivity and fellowship.Anna Freud (1930) sees that hostile death wishes towards a siblingcreates conflict only when the child perceives that the mother, incomprehensibly, loves those obstructive beings, and insists that he/shedirect part of his libido towards them. This dilemma can hasten theOedipal conflict.In his writings Winnicott (1957) relates to various disturbancesconnected to the birth of siblings, e.g. eating disorders, phobias, bedwetting, an imaginary friend. On the other hand, the presence of asibling brings the possibility of playing out different roles in gamesthat prepare children for maturity.Klein (1975) claims that conflicts and feelings of love and hatetowards siblings are critical in the development of guilt and reparation. These are important for the development of future relationshipsand a healthy society.Kohut (1971) discusses the effect of sibling relationships on thenarcissistic connection with the mother, and the role of siblings intheir functioning as parental replacements and as self-objects.

Ashuach: Am I My Brother’s Keeper?: Sibling Trauma 157Adler (1927), the first to have researched the subject of siblings,investigates primarily the advantages and disadvantages of being theeldest, the middle and the youngest sibling. He also speculates aboutthe various characteristics that stem from birth order.Continuing this line of thought, Sulloway (1997) points out thatbirth order is one of the elements that most contributes to differencesbetween siblings and competition among them. He sees order of birthas a main explanation for development of personality and connectsthis to the Darwinian theory of natural selection, which focuses onthe basic biological characteristics necessary in order to achieveparental preference.In recent years one can find in psychoanalytic literature expressions of the notion that siblings can serve as models for relationshipswith peers, with competitors and with strangers. Shapiro and Ginzberg(2001) point out that siblings are a source of intellectual stimulation.Siblings provide rich experiences through a wide variety of roles andgames. Siblings can serve as models for attachment and separation,social justice and group relations. Brunori (1998) sees the siblingrelationship as a complex area of feelings and sensation connected tocognitive, social and cultural developments.Rustin (2009), Lewin and Sharp (2009) are of the opinion that theexistence of siblings is in-born and pre-conceptual (Bion’s terminology). Siblings are always represented in the mind, whether they existin reality or not. Therefore, just as the infant expects there to be amother and father, so will he expect a sibling. Just as parental representations exist in the inner world of the child, so to do sibling representations. Moreover, these internal siblings will be expressed intransferential relationships in psychoanalytic work.In psychoanalytic literature one can find certain reference to sibling relationships, such as the influence of a dead brother, or being anonly child, or a twin. Lewin (2009) points to the connection betweentwins as a special example of sibling relations. The fantasy of a twinis universal and is based on developmental factors connected withexistential isolation. The feeling of being understood without words,to be known, is at the heart of the twin issue. Lewin points out twoimportant factors in the experience of twins: 1. Being the same, exactchronological age, they are always present in the mind of the parentsand of each other. 2. When there are two infants of the same age,attention given to one will always affect the quantity and quality ofattention given to the other.

158Group Analysis 45(2)Lewin’s points are important for understanding transferential relationships in an analytic group. Members of the group struggle for thequantity and quality of attention received by others, in reality and intheir fantasies about their place in the therapist’s mind. Furthermore,in the group the process of ‘twinning’ may be an attempt of each toget rid of unwanted parts of him/herself by isolating these parts andthen putting them into the other through projection and projectiveidentification.Sibling Relationships in Group LiteratureIn his theorizing Foulkes conceptualizes transference relationships inthe group as a form of sibling relationship. Unfortunately, he does notreally go into this issue, mentioning the word sibling only once in allhis writings, when he describes how someone new comes into thegroup. The event upsets group stability, similar to the entrance of anew sibling into the family.Foulkes (1957, 1966, 1968) recognizes that group members relateto each other and the conductor as transference figures. While in individual analysis, it is the therapist who is the focus of the transference,in the analytic group there is also focus on the other participants.Foulkes suggests the existence of horizontal transference but does notactually call it sibling transference. Perhaps for this reason there is little material on sibling relationships in the group analytic literature.Like Foulkes, Kaplan and Roman (1961) give much attention tothe introduction of a new member into the group. They think thisevent precipitates a form of narcissistic trauma.Lesser (1978), Marrone (1984), and Grunebaum and Solomon(1982) stress that many group interactions reflect sibling transferences. While the conductor is usually a parental figure—an authoritywho reflects concern and compassion—the group members oftenfunction as sibling replacements.Brown (1998), in his article on the role of sibling relationships,suggests that the analytic group brings out sibling dynamics and creates opportunities to process and channel them. His point of viewtakes into consideration not just the envy and competition betweensiblings as important to development but also cooperation and mutualconcern. He also points out the connection between problem-solvingin sibling relationships and the development of satisfactory relationships with peers. There are three phenomena that must be consideredin an analytic group. First, in interviewing potential new members,

Ashuach: Am I My Brother’s Keeper?: Sibling Trauma 159the conductor must ask about relationships with siblings, friends andparents and try to predict how these relationships will be expressed inthe group matrix. Second, in leading the group the conductor mustrelate to Oedipal competition or ‘brotherhood’ in such a way thatmembers will remain open to therapeutic exploration and change cantake place. And finally, as a member relates to the others and to thegroup-as-a-whole, he becomes part of a human, inter-subjectivematrix, acquiring a perspective that moves him beyond himself andthe traditional, repetitive patterns with his original objects, i.e., parents and siblings.Brown (1998) describes the basic applications of sibling dynamicsto a wide range of group experiences and interventions by the therapist. He emphasizes unique sibling phenomena, which can occur in agroup, such as the disruption of group stability when a new memberis introduced, or difficulties experienced by particular people whenentering a group. Other examples of sibling-related, transferentialphenomena are ‘twinning’ between two group members or members’reaction to co-therapy.Caffaro (2003) looks at the group through the prism of the familysystem and self-psychology. He points out that in the overall familysystem siblings constitute a sub-system that is highly significant forthem. First experiences with brothers and sisters leave an emotionalstamp whose influence can be felt in relationships and conflicts laterin life. The traditional therapeutic arena, which emphasizes child/parent relationships, can overlook the importance of sibling-relateddislocations and difficulties, despite the fact that they have a greateffect on coping style, moods and interpersonal relationships.Self-psychology emphasizes self-object relations in group experiences. Kohut (1971) sees the Self as being created in relationshipswith significant others. Sometimes siblings are used as the child’snecessary self-objects when parents are absent. Self-psychologyconceptualizes the experience of ‘twinning’. In a therapy group‘twinning’ occurs when one group member provides an opportunityfor another to strengthen and develop the Self through a self-objectrelationship. In addition, the whole group can also serve as a compassionate self-object.Nitsun (1996) points out that time-sharing and competition fortime is an element with anti-group potential, reminding us of Freud’scomments on the destructive power of groups (1921). Brown relatesto this conflict and claims that ‘a group that functions well can changefrom rigid equality to flexible justice’ (1998: 323), a quote that also