TRENDS IN STATE COURTS Parental Alienation Can Be .
TRENDS IN STATE COURTSParental AlienationCan Be EmotionalChild AbuseKen LewisDirector, Child Custody Evaluation Services of Philadelphia, Inc.What is and is not parentalalienation? Here are some of itsdescriptors, possible effects onchildren, and tips for custodyevaluators and family court judges.When marital discord evolves into hatred, manycouples are quick to see divorce as their best option.Divorce may be an easy way out for the couple, but itoften wreaks havoc on the children. When parents seekhelp from state courts, family court judges can appointmental health professionals as custody evaluators to guidethem in determining the future best interests of thechildren. While these professionals are historically skilledat identifying physical child abuse, they are beginning toidentify a more insidious form of emotional child abusecalled parental alienation. When this form of abuseis correctly and timely identified, custody evaluatorscan recommend specific strategies for success.Parental Alienation Can Be Emotional Child Abuse46
TRENDS IN STATE COURTSParental Alienation vs.Parental Alienation SyndromeWhile PAS identifies a problem in the child (“a childhooddisorder”), parental alienation identifies a collection ofone parent’s behaviors aimed at causing the child tobecome alienated from the other parent. Children canbecome alienated from a parent for a variety of reasons,such as sexual abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse,parental abandonment, adult alcoholism, narcissism, andother reasons. Sometimes, a child may become alienatedfrom the parent who initiated the divorce, blaming thatparent for breaking up the family. But while thesereasons may explain why the child is alienated from theparent, none would qualify as descriptors for parentalalienation. Parental alienation is a strategy whereby oneparent intentionally displays to the child unjustifiednegativity aimed at the other parent. The purpose ofthis strategy is to damage the child’s relationship withthe other parent and to turn the child’s emotions againstthat other parent. This strategy has been called a“head-trip game” (see Ken Lewis, Child Custody Evaluationsby Social Workers: Understanding the Five Stages of Custody[Washington, DC: NASW Press, 2009], p. 44).Parental alienation is frequently confused with theparental alienation syndrome (PAS). Dr. Richard Gardner,an American psychiatrist who died in 2003, coined thephrase “parental alienation syndrome” in 1985 andwrote extensively about it. He defined the syndrome as:a childhood disorder that arises almostexclusively in the context of child-custodydisputes. It is a disorder in which children,programmed by the allegedly “loved” parent,embark upon a campaign of denigration ofthe allegedly “hated” parent. The childrenexhibit little if any ambivalence over theirhatred, which often spreads to the extendedfamily of the allegedly despised parent(“Recommendations for Dealing with ParentsWho Induce a Parental Alienation Syndromein Their Children,” Journal of Divorce andRemarriage 28, nos. 3-4 [1998]).Parental alienation is a particular family dynamic thatcan emerge during divorce in which the child becomesexcessively hostile and rejecting of one parent. Thishostility can involve transgenerational dynamics aboutwhich evaluators and family court judges should be aware.Gardner used the term “syndrome” because of hismedical background. A syndrome is a cluster of relatedsymptoms. Syndromes are generally discouraged asevidence in court because they refer to symptoms froma collection of individuals, while the court is onlyconcerned with those individuals who have standingfor the matter before the court.The remainder of this article presents: a list of the various descriptors that identifyparental alienation;For Gardner, the syndrome describes the child’scampaign of denigration against one of their parents—a campaign that is encouraged by the other parent.It should be noted that there is no PAS when abuse orneglect is present. PAS can only be applicable when the“hated” parent has not abused or neglected the childor exhibited any behavior that would justify the child’sanimosity toward that parent. the possible effects on the children; parental alienation as a form of emotionalchild abuse; the ways that courts have responded toparental alienation; and 10 tips for family court judges.Parental Alienation Syndromecan only be applicable whenthe “hated” parent has notabused or neglected the childor exhibited any behaviorthat would justify the child’sanimosity toward that parent.Parental Alienation Can Be Emotional Child Abuse47
TRENDS IN STATE COURTSDescriptors of Parental AlienationEffects of Parental Alienationon the ChildrenWhen investigating whether parental alienation ispresent, a custody evaluator looks for a variety ofdescriptors concerning the targeted parent and thealienating parent. Ten such descriptors are:Parental alienation is a form of emotional child abuse.The potential impact of this abuse on a child’s life canbe devastating. Some of the frequently listed effectsof parental alienation have been reported in the childwelfare literature, including:1. The child expresses a relentless hatredfor the targeted parent.2. The child’s language parrots the languageof the alienating parent. an impaired ability to establish and maintainfuture relationships;3. The child vehemently rejects visiting thetargeted parent. a lowering of the child’s self-image; a loss of self-respect;4. Many of the child’s beliefs are enmeshedwith the alienating parent. the evolution of guilt, anxiety, and depressionover their role in destroying their relationshipwith a previously loved parent;5. Many of the child’s beliefs are delusionaland frequently irrational. lack of impulse control (aggression can turninto delinquent behavior); and6. The child’s reasons are not from directexperiences but from what has been toldto him or her by others. educational problems, disruptions in school.7. The child has no ambivalence in his or herfeelings; they are all hatred with no abilityto see the good.Family therapists who have treated alienated childrenhave classified the problem as a “parent-child relationalproblem,” as outlined by the American PsychiatricAssociation’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of MentalDisorders (4th ed.).8. The child has no capacity to feel guilty about hisor her behavior toward the targeted parent.9. The child and the alienating parent are inlockstep to denigrate the targeted parent.Parental Alienation and EmotionalChild Abuse in State Statutes10. The child can appear like a normal healthy child.But when asked about the targeted parent,it triggers his or her hatred.Children who suffer from emotional abuse oftenelude the legal assistance of the child protectionsystem. For example, this emotional abuse is usuallyinvisible to teachers and social workers and eventhe family court judge. The alienated child will talkwith the judge in language and syntax similar ifnot identical to the way the alienating parent talks.While the targeted parent often appears anxious,depressed, or angry, the alienating parent appearsrelaxed, composed, and, therefore, credible.Parental alienation is astrategy whereby one parentintentionally displays to thechild unjustified negativityaimed at the other parent.The purpose of this strategyis to damage the child’srelationship with the otherparent and to turn thechild’s emotions againstthat other parent.The normative framework of the child protectionsystem does not always include the emotional abuseof children. For the majority of states, the physicalhealth and safety of children are focal points indetermining whether abuse or neglect has occurred.Nonetheless, 48 states include emotional abuse ormaltreatment in their abuse definitions. (Emotionalmaltreatment is not included in statutory definitionsin Georgia and Washington, but it can be foundelsewhere in their statutes.)Parental Alienation Can Be Emotional Child Abuse48
TRENDS IN STATE COURTSSamples of Statutory Definitions in theUnited States and CanadaCalifornia“A child who is suffering serious emotional damage, or isat substantial risk of suffering serious emotional damage,evidenced by severe anxiety, depression, withdrawal,or untoward aggressive behavior toward self or others,as a result of the conduct of the parent or guardian.”W.I.C. §300 subd. (c) 2000 [Welfare and Institutions Code].Michigan“‘Serious mental harm’ means an injury to a child’smental condition that is not necessarily permanentbut results in visibly demonstrable manifestationsof a substantial disorder of thought or mood whichsignificantly impairs judgment, behavior, capacityto recognize reality.” MCL 750.136b (1)(g).Punishment for serious mental harm is prescribed:“A person is guilty of child abuse in the first degreeif the person knowingly or intentionally causes seriousphysical or serious mental harm to a child. Child abuse inthe first degree is a felony punishable by imprisonmentfor not more than 15 years.” MCL 750.136b (2).Wyoming“‘Mental injury’” means an injury to the emotionalstability of a child as evidenced by an observable impairment in his ability to function within a normalrange of performance.”Wyo. Stat. § 14-3-202 (A) (2006).Minnesota“Persons guilty of neglect or endangerment (include)a parent who endangers the child’s health by: permitting a child to be placed in a situation likelyto substantially harm the child’s emotional health.”Minn. Stat. § 609.378, Subdivision 1 (a)(2)(b)(1) (2005).Manitoba“The best interests of the child shall be the paramountconsideration of the court in all proceedings .[R]elevant matters shall [include] the child’sopportunity to have a parent-child relationship as awanted and needed member within a family structure [and] the emotional needs of the child andthe appropriate care to meet such needs.”The Child and Family Services Act, 1985, C.C.S.M. c. C80 2(1)(a) & (b)[Continuing Consolidation of the Statutes of Manitoba].Nevada“'Substantial mental harm' means an injury to the emotional condition of a child as evidenced byan observable and substantial impairment of theability of the child to function within his normalrange of performance or behavior.”Nev. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 200.508, 4 (e) (2006).OntarioNorth Dakota“No person having charge of a child shall permitthe child to suffer from a mental, emotional ordevelopmental condition that, if not remedied,could seriously impair the child’s development.”Ontario Child and Family Services Act, R.S.O. 1990,Chapter C.11 sec. 79 (2)(b)(ii).“A parent who willfully inflicts upon thechild mental injury is guilty of a class C felonyexcept if the victim is under the age of sixyears in which case the offense is a class B felony.”N.D Cent. Code, § 14-09-22.1 (2013).Parental Alienation Can Be Emotional Child Abuse49
TRENDS IN STATE COURTSWhether “mental harm,” “mental injury,” “emotionalinstability,” “emotional endangerment,” “emotionaldamage,” or some other phrase, it is clear thatemotional child abuse is a statutory crime. Whenone parent intentionally encourages the child toturn against the other parent, he or she is employingparental alienation as a strategy.How the Courts Have Respondedto Parental AlienationWhen this strategy is used by one parent in hopes ofalienating the child against the other parent, it istantamount to teaching the child how to hate. CanadianJudge John H. Gomery put it eloquently this way:“Hatred is not an emotion that comes naturally to a child.It has to be taught . Defendant has deliberatelypoisoned the minds of his children against the motherthat they formerly loved and needed” (Stuart-Mills, P. v.Cher, A.J., Sup. Ct. Quebec, District of Montreal [1991]).with custody a criminal offense. For example, NewJersey makes interference a crime of the third degreethat may lead to imprisonment for three to five yearsor a fine of 7,500 or both. All states make emotionalchild abuse or maltreatment of a child a criminaloffense. Some extreme cases of parental alienationmay warrant this response.Courts in different states have responded to parentalalienation in different ways. Basically, there have beenfour categories of these responses.Criminal Response. Some states make interferenceCivil Remedies. All courts can impose civil sanctionsby way of contempt-of-court orders. When a parent’sstrategy of parental alienation endangers the child’srelationship with the other parent, some of the possiblecivil remedies may be economic sanctions againstthe alienating parent or short incarceration time forcontempt of court.Parental alienation can be administered in mild orextreme amounts, or anything in between. In its extremeform, it can be defined as criminal behavior, consistentwith the various state definitions presented above.Custody Responses. All courts that have initialcustody jurisdiction have the authority to modifyprevious custody orders. Responses to parental alienationhave been to deny initial custody (order a parentalalienation evaluation, deny custody to the alienatingparent); to modify visitation (extend visits betweenthe child and the alienated parent, establish supervisedvisitations); and to modify previous custody (temporarymodification of custody for specific time periods,permanent modification of custody, reverse custody).Therapeutic Responses. Family law’s innovationsand reforms have become the showcase for therapeuticjurisprudence. Parental alienation cases provideopportunity to demonstrate how the strategy ofreplacing the “punishment” role of the courts with thetherapeutic “fix-the-problem” approach can advantagechildren. Evaluation and therapy are earmarks of thetherapeutic response to parental alienation.When the strategy [of parentalalienation] is successful,the emotional consequencesto the child can be damagingand may rise to the levelof criminal behavior.The court could order an evaluation of the child todetermine whether parental alienation is operativein a case and, if so, at what level is it operative. The court could order individual therapyfor the alienator. The court could order family therapyin mild cases. Parental alienation therapy by a specialist couldbe ordered by the court in extreme cases.Parental Alienation Can Be Emotional Child Abuse50
TRENDS IN STATE COURTSTen Tips for Custody Evaluators and Family Court JudgesTip #1Tip #2There is no parental alienation when thereis reasonable justification for the child toexpress negativity against one parent.Parental alienation can be a strategy usedby the custodial parent, the noncustodialparent, or both parents.Tip #3Parental alienation is nearly impossiblewhen the child is an infant.Tip #4The beginning stage of parental alienation isdifficult to begin in the child’s late teen years.Tip #5Tip #6Tip #7Tip #8Tip #9Tip #10Parental alienation can be operative onone sibling, while not operative on theother siblings.If parental alienation is suspected or alleged,it should be assessed by a custody evaluatorexperienced in the matter.Extreme parental alienation should beconsidered emotional child abuse andreferred criminally.Often parental alienation can be reducedor eradicated by ordering more timebetween the child and the targeted parent.When a child spends frequent positivetime (primary experience) with one parent,it is less likely that the other parent’sparental alienation strategy will be successful.Parental alienation case law is growing;family court judges should become familiarwith cases in their jurisdictions.Identify mental health professionals in familycourt jurisdictions who have expertise inparental alienation.Parental Alienation Can Be Emotional Child Abuse51Parental AlienationBench CardParental Alienation Descriptors1.The child expresses a relentless hatredfor the targeted parent.2.The child’s language parrots the languageof the alienating parent.3.The child vehemently rejects visiting the targeted parent.4.Many of the child’s beliefs are enmeshedwith the alienating parent.5.Many of the child’s beliefs are delusionaland frequently irrational.6.The child’s reasons derive from what hasbeen told to the child by others.7.The child has no ambivalence about hisor her negative feelings; they are all hatred.8.The child feels no guilt about his or her negativity toward the targeted parent.9.The child and the alienating parent are inlockstep to denigrate the targeted parent.10. The child can appear like a normal healthychild, but, when asked about the targetedparent, it triggers his or her hatred.Effects of Parental Alienationon the Alienated Child1.An impaired ability to establish and maintainfuture relationships.2.A low self-image.3.A loss of self-respect.4.Over time: guilt and depression for destroyingthe relationship with a previously loved parent.5.Lack of impulse control. Aggression can turninto delinquent behavior.Court’s Possible ResponsesDuring Child Custody Litigation1.Enter order to determine whether parentalalienation is operative and, if so, at what level.2.Order individual therapy for the alienator.3.Order family therapy in mild cases.4.In more severe cases, order parentalalienation therapy by a specialist.Caution: If possible, parental alienation should beaddressed in its early stages. It is significantly moredifficult to treat if it progresses over time and growsmore intense.
Parental alienation is frequently confused with the parental alienation syndrome (PAS). Dr. Richard Gardner, an American psychiatrist who died in 2003, coined the phrase “parental alienation syndrome” in 1985 and wrote extensively about it. He defined
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