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THE FIL-AM COURIER JUNE 16 -30, 2017 PAGE 3SERVING THE COMMUNITY SINCE 1987PUBLISHERSMary Llanos CorderoDavid CorderoMANAGING EDITORBennette Espineli MisaluchaDIRECTOR OF DESIGNArmando Dela Cruz BusmentePRODUCTION MANAGERAlice Llanos BusmenteASSISTANT EDITORRadiant CorderoBy RADIANT CORDEROCOPY EDITORDanielle EvangelistaPHOTOGRAPHERS/GRAPHICSBrandon dela CruzNoah FelipeGabe de LisoJeff OrigJames RamosCOLUMNISTSEdna AlikpalaRhoda Yabez Alvarez, Esq.Jesse Bacon IINancy BernalCesar BonillaAlice Llanos BusmenteAmelia Casamina CabatuAnabel Gasmen CabebeDr. Rickie CamaraDr. Patricia HalagaoKristian LeiDr. Niki LibariosZeny MuyotAngie SantiagoPerfecto Yasay Jr.CONTRIBUTING WRITERSConrad AbuelRic AgnesPaul AlimbuyaoRia BaldeviaEriza BarengMarnelli Joy BasilioBernie CaalimRandy CortezRadiant CorderoMary CruzadaJaime de JesusBrandon dela CruzChristian EvangelistaImelda GasmenVeronika GeronimoLeo GozarBen GutierrezLalaine IgnaoKathleen LeeCarmela MinayaGladys Quinto MarroneGladys MenorJohn PagaraganPaola RodelasJudy RelosimonSandra SagisiNicole VelascoJason UbayMichi VillaruzNEIGHBOR ISLAND BUREAUMauiKit ZuluetaJeremy ZaneBig IslandMil AsuncionJane ClementDr. Margarita HopkinsKauaiVirgie CruzadaLiza TrinidadMarynell ValenzuelaADVERTISING SALESMarivic AldayaMary CorderoAnnabel CabebeFlorence Tan McCollomLydia KamiyaJoni Redick-YundtRudy BautistaMarynel ValenzuelaCIRCULATIONFlorence Tan (Oahu)Ron Oshiro (Leeward Oahu)David Cordero (Maui)Marynel Valenzuela (Kauai)Milli Asuncion (Big Island)LEGAL COUNSELAlfredo Evangelista, Esq.Atty. Ernesto Urbano (Phils.)THE FIL-AM COURIERis published twice a month byOAHU RELOCATION SERVICESlocated at 2221 Liliha St.Honolulu, Hawaii 96817Opinions expressed by the columnists are their ownand do not necessarily reflect those of the Fil-AmCourier. Publisher reserves the right to edit lettersto the editor and other material submitted. Reproduction of material and ads appearing in the Fil-Amcourier is forbidden without written permission. Allphotos submitted become the property of the FilAm Courier.Telephone: 808.595.8787Facsimile: 808.595.6883E-Mail: eration of Filipino American Media Associationsof the United States and CanadaFFAMASHawaii Filipino American Media CouncilAll rights reserved printed in the u.s.a I remember rolling my eyes a lotat my dad.Then, I got smart, I rolled myeyes after he left the room.But, the weird thing is, all thatstuff my dad taught me when I was asmall kid — that stuff I would roll myeyes at — is the same stuff I recite tomyself often, if not on a daily basisas an adult. I also am fully aware thatit will be even more prevalent as Igrow older.We learn a lot from our dads —even if that wasn’t their intention —and there are some lessons that stickwith a person for a lifetime.Dads are full of wisdom that weoverlook and take for granted. It’s adamn good thing they tell us thesame stuff over and over; otherwise,we may never really learn it.When it comes to pep talks, mydad would nail it every single time.Maybe because he was a coach,maybe it was because we were youngand it was easy to say it throughstories or mantras. Since I was a kid,he was always trying to teach mybrothers, cousins, and me thingsabout life through repeating short,easy-to-remember mantras over andover again.The eye-rolling would ensue,but, now I find myself passing thesemantras off to others who are in needof encouragement, whether they arefriends, coworkers, or even aseatmate on the airplane.Out of three children, I am theeldest child, but, I am also the onlydaughter to my parents.In light of that, I was always thechild that was extra loud, extraextravagant, and extra rebellious.Therefore, I received extra peptalks which required a ton of patienceif one was speaking to me.Luckily, my dad is never one tohave a temper or get riled up(although, I would still get riled upbecause I was receiving yet anothertalk).Also, luckily, my dad is one dadwho does not shy away from theinfamous and inescapableTo all the dads out there, keeptelling your kids stuff they don’t wantto hear. They don’t realize it now, but,they’ll need it all later.And when you realize you taughtthem everything they need to knowin life, even if you’re no longeraround, they’ll be grateful.Thankfully, my dad is still alive And he’s still telling me the same stuffover and over and over .Today, I am just 27 years old andat this tender age, my dad has taughtme a lot of things that I still have ahard time grasping.My dad has instilled in me to stopbeing afraid and to step outside ofmy comfort zone. Whenever fear andworry take over, he is always quickto dispel it from our minds, mouths,and mannerisms.He has shown me and given anexample of what hard work looks like.He has shown by example thetype of confidence that a personshould have. I too hope I can exudethe same type of confidence in mylife.He has shown me theopportunities that exist in front of me,but, at the same time, he has left thedecision up to me in terms of whichpath to choose.Thanks, dad, for all theselessons and the lessons to come.Happy Father’s Day!

PAGE 4 THE FIL-AM COURIER JUNE 16-30, 2017By LALAINE IGNAOABOUT OUR COVERThis beautiful picture of the Halagaofamily evokes great positive feelings oflove and familial ties even as wecelebrate Fatherhood in this issue of theFil-am Courier.Left to right: Jordan, AJ, Patricia andMarissa Halagao of Honolulu, Hawaii.Photo Credit:Julia Sieber of Sieber Studio.Cover concept and design by NoahFelipe or OrigMedia. Mahalo to JeffOrig of OrigMedia. Both Jeff and Noahcan be reached at www.Origmedia.comor by calling 808 447 9559.“While my wife and children aremy top priority, it’s very importantto me that I fulfill my responsibilitiesat work and my commitments to thecommunity. I love my job and Itreasure my community service. Inmy capacities at HEI and my boardservice at nonprofits, I get to helpmake Hawaii a better place. It’seasy to make time for work whenyou love what you’re doing and youhave the support of your family.”Born in Illocos Sur, AvelinoJimeno “AJ” Halagao, Jr. grew upin Washington D.C. and moved toHawaii in 2000. He currently holdsthe position of Manager ofCorporate and CommunityAdvancement at HEI, as well asExecutive Vice President of the HEICharitable Foundation. Thisfoundation supports programs thatfoster educational excellence,economic growth, environmentalsustainability, and communitydevelopment. Within the Filipinocommunity, HEI CharitableFoundation has supported theFilipino Community Center, FilipinoChamber of Commerce of Hawaii,Operation Manong and Fil4Kids.Although this all may seem a lotalready, Halagao’s work does notend there.Outside of his rewarding career,Halagao also volunteers for avariety of organizations, aschairman for the City & County ofHonolulu’s Grants-in-Aid AdvisoryCommission and as president ofHawaii Cares. “Additionally, I’m onthe board of directors of some trulywonderfulcommunityorganizations, including FilipinoCommunity Center, After-SchoolAll-Stars, Aloha Medical Mission,UH Pacific Asian Center forEntrepreneurship,HawaiiPresidential Center Initiative, andHawaii Catholic CommunityFoundation,” Halagao added.“My children, Marissa andJordan, mean the world to me, andin anything I do, they are mybiggest inspirations. My favoriteFather’s Day was my first one.Marissa was just a day old whenwe brought her home from thehospital on Father’s Day. Sincethen, as a father, I’ve had the timeof my life.”Despite his busy schedule,Halagao consistently makes timefor his family. 12-year-old MarissaHalagao shared, “Wheneverthere’s a big school event I’minvolved in, 75% of the time Daddywould say, ‘Hmmm I have to get tothe office or to a doctor ’sappointment or I have a breakfastmeeting . . . but I’ll see if I can makeit.’ And 100% of the time, when Igaze across the audience I will spotmy Daddy in the back, gettingcoffee at the beverage table, readyto watch the show. I can alwayscount on my Daddy to be there andput me in front of himself. Hesupports me by just simply beingthere.” Her 10-year-old brother,Jordan, also agrees, stating that“Daddy is very involved. He alwayscoaches me in soccer, baseball andbasketball.”This father makes a consciouseffort to drive his children to schoolevery morning, even if it can

THE FIL-AM COURIER JUNE 16 -30, 2017 PAGE 5sometimes be a struggle gettingeveryone ready for the day. “Butonce we’re on the road, I reallyenjoy it. It’s a time for the three ofus to be together, and a wonderfulway to begin my day.” Asmentioned before, Halagao takesthe time to attend his children’sevents and spend time with them,taking the children out and sharingtheir passion for sports throughactivities and events. This, ofcourse, becomes possible with thehelp of his other half, former Boardof Education member and UHProfessor Patricia EspirituHalagao, who recently accepted aposition where she will chair theDepartment of Curriculum Studiesat the UH College of Education.Together, this powerhouse coupleworks with constant coordinationand cooperation to balanceeverything in their life.“Because her scholarship wasgroundbreaking, her career was atop priority in our household – moreimportant than mine. I was goingto do everything I could to supporther career. Whether she had toteach an evening class or travel tothe U.S. mainland to attend aneducation conference or take extratime for her research and writing, Iwould make sure I was home totake care of our family, and provideher the time that she needs.”Earlier this month, Patricia waselevated to full professor at UH.Because both sides of theextended families live on themainland, the couple always syncstheir schedules to make sure oneof them, or a family friend, can helpout with caring for the children andtheir basic needs. “Ironically, ourchildren’s schedules – withpractices, games, art, music andhula lessons – can be even morePatricia Halagaohectic than ours. We make it work,but it takes a team effort.” Halagaoshared that in order to keep amarriage alive, his guidingprinciples include compassion,compromise, listening and learningas well as the most important of all,love.To Halagao, even though heholds many titles in his professionalcareer and outreach life, the titlesthat mean the most to him include“Father, Husband and Son.” Heshares, “My careers and mycompanies change. But I will alwaysbe Marissa and Jordan’s father,Patricia’s husband, and the son ofAvelino and Concepcion Halagao.”Lalaine Ignao moved to Oahu in2016 with hopes of engaging withthe Filipino community. A graduateof Seattle University with a degreein Strategic Communications, sheenjoys writing lifestyle, cultural andprofile stories along with reflectivepiecesthatshowcasehervulnerable and honest self. Duringher free time, you can find herdabbling in art projects, graduateschool or in wanderlust.AJ and Patricia with their children, Marissa and Jordan.

PAGE 6 THE FIL-AM COURIER JUNE 16-30, 2017By LALAINE IGNAOCultural differences nevercrossed Timothy Lum’s mind whenhe began dating his wife 42 yearsago, let alone when they gotmarried. “I just thought that I wasdating this beautiful gal and weliked each other. I didn’t look at itas this Chinese boy dating thisFilipino girl.” Instead of becomingimmersed in his Chinese culture,Lum’s parents brought him up withCatholic values and traditions. Theextent of his cultural experiencecame from his mother speakingChinese and grew up with thetraditional fireworks on New Years.Even then, he felt like the traditionrepresented more of a Hawaiiancustom than Chinese. “My momwould cook some Chinese food butfor the most part, growing up myattitude was more of ‘I’m in Hawaii.’I didn’t have much of a Chineseidentity even though I knew I wasChinese. I just felt like I was aregular boy growing up in Hawaii.”Cultural Differences inMarriage Is Not a Deterrentto HappinessWhen Lum and his wife, Ailyn,started their family, culturaltradition and values did not have ahuge impact on raising theirchildren. “Our philosophy is that wewant to raise our kids to be goodkids who could contribute to thecommunity. In terms of culture, wewould expose them to their culturalbackground whenever we could.”The couple’s family comprises offour kids, three boys and one girl.All the boys, Christopher, Mitchelland Daniel, have graduated fromcollege and their daughter,Marissa, just finished her secondyear of schooling at the Universityof Hawaii but will transfer toOccidental University in LosAngeles and plans to study biology.“When my kids were young, wedid whatever we could to take careof them. When they got a little olderand started to play sports, wesupported them and became theirtransportation and, whenever Icould, coach them.” Lum embodiesthe type of father who consistentlytried to stay active and present inhis children’s lives. “I was alwaysthe type of person where, eventhough my job needs me to work awhole week, I always have theattitude whenever I finished workthat I’m going straight homebecause I have four kids and a wifeat home. I don’t want to go to thebar and drink with my coworkers. Iwant to go home and spend timewith my family.”The biggest aspect of thechildren’s upbringing that relates toFilipino culture comes from the factthat Ailyn and Tim provided themwith a Catholic upbringing. Eachchild became an altar server andwent through the whole regimen,receiving the sacraments up toConfirmation. Along with passingdown their Catholic upbringing tothe children, the Lum family takesthe time to visit Ailyn’s mother’shome for dinner. “It’s not hardcoreFilipino food, it’s local Hawaiianfood. But she does make adobo,pinakbet and lumpia, which is thebest.” As his wife got older, Ailynwould became more active in theFilipino community and participatein a variety of organizations andevents. “I support her and sheinvites me to all the events butshe’s okay if I say no every oncein awhile. She would take one ofour children or one of hergirlfriends or cousins. It’s sort of afamily affair.” This also becameanother aspect of how Lum’schildren learned more about theirFilipino heritage, along with Ailynsharing stories about her fatherand his life growing up in thePhilippines.Out of all the cross culturalchallenges that Lum could possiblygo through, he points out thelanguage barrier between him andhis in-laws and understanding theirIlocano accent when speaking tohim. “My oldest son actually pickedup the language and would be mytranslator. Whenever they spoke inIlocano, I would pull him aside andask him, ‘Chris! What are theytalking about?’”At the end of the day, all thatmatters to Lum consists of sharinghis life with his family and enjoyinglife together. Regardless of theircultural differences, Lum and hiswife choose to look beyond thatand focus on their values andmorals as a couple and as a family.Lalaine Ignao moved to Oahu in2016 with hopes of engaging withthe Filipino community. A graduateof Seattle University with a degreein Strategic Communications, sheenjoys writing lifestyle, cultural andprofile stories along with reflectivepiecesthatshowcasehervulnerable and honest self. Duringher free time, you can find herdabbling in art projects, graduateschool or in wanderlust.

THE FIL-AM COURIER JUNE 16 -30, 2017 PAGE 7By ANGIE DYTIOCO SANTIAGOAn “angel” is defined as aperson of exemplary conduct orvirtue. So it’s no wonder that myDad was named “Angel” by myperceptive Lola Maria Sapitan.Growing up, my Dad alwaystaught us that, “Charity Begins atHome”. This was evident of hismanifest love, devotion, andsacrifice for his family. Everythingmy Dad has done was always forhis family.Dad and my Mom Rubing havebeen sweethearts since theirteenage years. At the age of 23,Dad joined the U.S. Navy. Fiveyears later, Dad received anhonorable discharge, and he andMom got married three weeks later.In 1965, Dad left his familybehind in the Philippines in orderto pursue a college education fromthe University of Hawaii using hisG.I. Bill benefits. He became a fulltime student at the University ofHawaii, living on a 250-a-monthveteran’s stipend most of which hesent home to his family. To helpmake ends meet, my Dad joined thePeace Corps and became aTagalog language instructor andtaught on the Big Island andMolokai. At the age of 38, Dadgraduated from the U.H. with aBachelor of Science degree inAgriculture and became the first ofhis siblings to graduate fromcollege.In 1972, Dad petitioned for hisfamily to come to Hawaii. Growingup in Whitmore, we lived a simpleMy Dad –An AbsoluteAngel!life, but felt blessed and not at alldisadvantaged. We did everythingas a family – from growing our ownvegetables, fishing, crabbing,going to the beach, picking fruitsaround the island, and helping ourDad with his yard maintenance andjanitorial services business. Wetook family trips to the Philippinesto visit relatives and reconnectedwith our culture. My siblings and Itook music lessons and soon theDytioco Rondallia was formed, andwe entertained at events andfunctions.My Dad rarely asked for much,and anytime he was given any typeof gift, his response would alwaysbe, “It’s EXACTLY what I want!” Theonly thing that he did ask for thattruly made my Dad beam with prideand joy was for his four children –Noel, Leo, Solly, and myself - tograduate from college.In the 56 years of my parents’marriage and their 63 years of lifetogether, my parents never failedto show their unconditional love forFamily picture of Angel and Rubing Dytioco's 50th Anniversary in 2011.In 1971, Angel Dytioco graduated from the University of Hawaii with a BS inAgriculture.Angel Dytioco proudly served theU.S. Navy from 1956 to 1961.one another and their constantdevotion to their family.My Dad retired from theFederal Government with 30 yearsof service. Recently, at the age of83, he took an “early” retirementfrom the City & County of Honoluluto spend more time with my Mom.Nothing is more gratifying to myDad than to care for her–cooking,doing laundry, cleaning the house,and helping out with her dailyhealth needs.Although my Dad taught usthat “charity begins at home,” hischarity went far beyond our home.It included helping out relativesback in the Philippines. Dad alsopaved the way by petitioning mymaternal grandfather and myMom’s six siblings and their familiesso they can have a better life inAmerica.My Dad exemplified the virtuesof being kind to others, giving backto the community, treating peoplewith respect, overcomingobstacles, and practicing daily hisbelief that “Charity begins at home.”That’s why my Dad’s given nametruly fits him — he is an absoluteAngel!Angie Dytioco Santiago, our Gathering Place columnist, is a U.H. Manoa graduate.Angie is currently a Governor of the United Filipino Council of Hawaii (UFCH), theRecording Secretary of the Bulacan Circle & Associates of Hawaii (BCAH), and theAssistant Treasurer for the Filipino Chamber of Commerce of Hawaii (FCCH). Sheserved as an Assistant Auditor for the Philippine Celebrations CoordinatingCommittee of Hawaii (PCCCH) from 2015-2016, as 1st Vice President of theOahu Filipino Community Council (OFCC) from 2013 to 2014, and as BCAH Presidentfrom 2010 to 2012. She is the daughter of Angel &RubingDytioco and is marriedwith two sons. She enjoys photography and participating in cultural and socialactivities and events.The Dytioco's family trip to San Francisco in 2014: Angie Santiago, AngeloDytioco, Rubing and Angel Dytioco, Noel Dytioco, and Solly Dytioco.

PAGE 8 THE FIL-AM COURIER JUNE 16-30, 2017By ATTY. RHODA YABESALVAREZ, Esq.The issue of legal custody andphysical custody over a child whenparents divorce or partners separateis an emotional one. This isespecially so when parties cannotcommunicate, which is the mainreason for separation. However,there are workable solutions whenthe best interest of the child becomesthe standard. Consider this scenarioof our long distance father.Question: My wife and I havebeen divorced and we have a child.In the divorce decree, we bothagreed to joint legal custody and jointphysical custody over our child. Thisarrangement worked for us havingboth agreed to live in the same areanear our child’s school with ourdecision to make the best interest ofour child our priority. Recently, myex-wife has taken a promotion whichrequires her to move to the mainland.I am not objecting to our child leavingbut I now that I am confronted withthe prospect of separation, I wonderhow I can maximize parenting mychild while we are apart. How is thisdone in a legal setting?Answer:When the parent and the childlive on different islands or in differentstates, time sharing between the noncustodial parent and the custodialparent can prove tricky. However,with proper communication andcoordination between both parents,it can be done.While it is true that the parentwho is away from the child is limitedby geographical distance, workschedule, variance in time zones,school schedules, budgetaryconstraints,amongotherconsiderations, nevertheless,available technology allows forvarious modes of interaction betweenparent and child while apart, such asSkype, Messenger, text, emails andtelephone calls, on a regular or settime. Various forms of social mediaalso allow an easy access for parentand child to stay in touch and shareinformation while physically apart.With online access andinformation sharing, the long distanceparent can be on top of theinformation regarding the child’s careproviders such as doctors, dentists,teachers, tutors, counselors,coaches and instructors. It is idealfor information about

Jun 02, 2016 · JUNE 24, 2017 Filipino Cultural Night at the 50th State Fair Aloha Stadium 5:00 PM A night of celebrating Filipino culture in Hawaii thru Filipino music, fashion and dance! Brought to you by E.K. Fernandez Shows and 96.7FM KPHI Filipino Radio For more information Contact Person: Al